Sunday, February 24, 2013

"It's Not In How You Fall..."

It’s rare to remember the most meaningful and thoughtful words of wisdom we’ve ever received. I’m not talking about career advice, but life-affirming words of action. 

If you asked me earlier today, I might not be able to give you an answer as to what it would be for me.

It was only in hearing it again, in nearly the same words, through someone else’s pain, journey, and subsequent triumph that it sunk in. Thank you Ben Affleck. 

Why do we give advice? In sincerity, it has nothing to do with wielding your opinion over someone who is too hurt to have their own. 

My hope when it comes to advice is to allow someone feel something they otherwise might not. 

The hope is to figuratively reach into someone’s soul and gradually peel back the layers, one by one, until they’re not afraid of the emotion that’s keeping them from moving forward. 

The hope is to offer an honest and earnest suggestion that will lay the path, however gradual, to peace and ultimately joy. 

I started this Grace Redefined journey on the heels of one such piece of advice: 

“It’s not in how you fall down, it’s how you get up,” she said to me in a text message. 

I stared at it and recalled similar words from my Grandma left behind in a handwritten and undated notecard. She wrote, “Life lessons are hard - changes! bumps in the road! discussions.” 

Then, armed with this new information I wrote my first blog post and arrived at my own version

“It’s not in how we fall, or if we fall, or how many times we fall, it’s that we do get back up.”

Next to knowing that is knowing there are people, probably few, but there are people in our lives who will pursue us and our need to meet joy even when we are in the midst of our own junk. God does that, so why can’t we? 
Blessed are we who have at least one or two people who will meet us right where we are. Blessed are we who has someone who is there to let us know they’ll still be there when we finally do get on our own feet. 

Rising up isn’t about walking away from those who carried us, it’s about walking alongside them so we can prop them up when their knees become weak. 

If you’ve fallen down and you’re walking ahead, you’ll know who those people are because they’re right there with you and if you have to... you catch each other and struggle up.

1 comment:

  1. Funny that you'd talk about remembering meaningful words. I was fallen once and I didn't get up for a long time. Those were definitely dark times. All it took was for one of my closest friends to sincerely compliment me because he was someone I really looked up to. I viewed him as one of the wisest, although most reserved people I knew at the time. Literally the only words he said were along the lines of "You're very insightful." After hearing this, I seemed to have had my life flash before my eyes except not in the almost-death kind of way. Instead, it felt like I was being reborn.

    Looking back, I don't even remember the context of the conversation. I think I was beating myself up and he cheered me up by bringing out a characteristic that he liked about me. Having someone I looked up to so much comment and say he found me insightful was enough for me to find my belief in myself again. He caught me as I was on my way lower and lower and I got back up. The funny thing is, even today he does not know the impact of those words and I doubt he even remembers saying it, but that's okay.


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