I’m not a fan of silence, but I like the quiet.
I’m restless, and perhaps even clumsy, with the wondering and wandering mind that comes with the space-between this and that.
Even still, somehow I managed to hunker down and not write on this website in one day shy of three full months (notice it's been longer than three months, but I almost published a post three months ago and that's what this about). The magnitude and pure sum of the what has occurred in that time is quite ordinary in the span of a life, of any life, but I look at it and it’s more than an Oprah aha moment.
On July 14, 2013 I sat down to reflect upon a collision of events set forth life into motion for nearly everyone I know. Some of them experienced big moments, milestone life-changing moments, and some of them just affected, impacted, or inspired by those moments. I’m talking about loss, excitement of a baby coming into the world (and she’s coming soon!), and the possibility of a new job. I never finished writing.
Tonight, I sat down to write again and seek connection with whoever is reading and found my words from that day in July. Here they were, just left for me to read. Perhaps they didn’t need an introduction, but I never enjoyed walking into a room mid-conversation, and probably wonder too much about unexpected silences.
So, here are my words, by the grace of God they’re still here... and considering what I wrote it’s fitting that it took time to get it out there:
“If you ask my parents what the most annoying phrase I said growing up they would tell you it was, “I know.” But, before that phase, it was, “Are we there yet?”
I think, as people, we’re always in a hurry to see the next step. If you’re a little bit like me, you like plans, and want to know how something is going to go before it’s going. In some ways, some of us sit in the car without having ever been handed the keys!
This past week taught me a little bit about plans and hope. It taught me a little bit about letting go and embracing joy. Somehow, in one 24-hour period my heart broke and cried and my heart smiled and cried with joy. The glue holding it together is life. The magical, miraculous, Heaven-sent creation of a life.”